Ecclesiastes 9:9, “Enjoy life with your wife, whom you love, all the days of this meaningless life that God has given you under the sun—all your meaningless days. For this is your lot in life and in your toilsome labor under the sun.”
“You don’t know my wife.” Perhaps this is a common statement made by many husbands carries the weight of a negative expression. And perhaps, you’re right, another person does not “know” your wife, but are they supposed to know her like you do? God has not called anyone except for you to leave and cleave to the woman that you married to.
Marriage is definitely under fire in these days. Hence the statement “you don’t know my wife,” should be an extreme positive and not a negative. Solomon writes of the futility of life, and hence because it is here today and gone tomorrow, one should rejoice in one’s marriage, instead of being depressed in one’s marriage if marriage is done God’s way. Solomon shares the following points in how one can rejoice in marriage:
1. Live Joyfully: This speaks of being full of Joy (JOY-FULLY). Joy is the fruit of being in the presence of the Lord (Psalm 16:11). Paul writes of the fruit of the Spirit one of which is JOY (Galatians 5:22). The popular question had been “are you living a purpose driven life,” however I think the better question is, “Are you living a “presence driven life.” When two people in a marriage are both spending time in the Lord’s presence all that needs to be done is to bring all that JOY together, to live joyfully. Are you and your wife spending DAILY time in His presence?
2. Relate with Joy together: The key word here is “WITH”. God’s desire for marriage is that not only do both husband and wife spend time in the presence of the Lord thus creating a dovetail of like-mindedness, but husbands are privileged to do this WITH their very best friend. I heard an acronym for J.O.Y., which stood for Jesus Others You! Jesus must come first, others, in this case your wife is second on the top of the others list, and you are last but not forgotten.
3. Love Your Wife: Why did you get married? People have many reasons, and many which are selfish. Paul however tells us in Ephesians 5, “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.” In the Garden of Eden Eve ate the fruit and therefore deserved to die. The conversation at the garden would have gone something like this, God says, “Adam I have to kill her.” Adam reply, “No God, please take my life instead. I will die in her place”. Of course the account did not really lay out this way with the first Adam, but it did with the second Adam. Christ gave His life for His beloved bride, and modeled what men are to do for their wives. Jesus said, “No greater love is there than this, that a man lay his life down for his friends.” Men, our wives are to be our very best friend, and therefore in one word we are to show them love through SACRIFICE!
When one lives JOYFULLY, relates WITH joy together, and loves SACRIFICIALLY, the principle remains that one can live a full life with ones’ life marked by JOY IN MARRIAGE! Now go live with His Joy in your marriage, it’s really possible! Blessings Pastor Phil