John 15:13, “Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one’s life for his friends”.
Remember when you would imagine growing up, schooling to have the job of your dream, marrying the woman or the man of your dream? You kind of imagined how it would be like, you played husband or wife with the toys that were given to you? Now you are in marriage, it’s not like what you anticipated, you’ve discovered it is hard work. A lot of life adjusting styles and you have to make changes beause CHANGE IS ALWAYS A CHOICE ACCOMPANIED BY COMMITMENT. Someone said, “Marriages are made in heaven but they are perfected here on earth”. It’s a school of learning.
What if marriage was not created by God to make us happy but to make us holy, how would you approach it? Marriage is two best friends (a man and a woman) who have decided to be joined together in a holy matrimony by God through His chosen people. The bible says that, Mark 10:9, “Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.” This is not just people outside but even people in that marriage covenant. It’s God’s seal and honors the commitment. I have been married for 2½ years now and I keep praying for strength to lay my life down for the sake of the one I love. That is what marriage is, laying your life for the rest of it for the sake of someone else. Jesus taught us what marriage is like when He as the Groom laid down His life for the sake of His friends. He laid aside His majesty, giving up everything for the sake of those He loved but never forced His bride to love and follow Him. A Christian teacher said something that was breathtaking, he said “do you realize that in the bible wives are not commanded to love? Why is that, they are created to love, on the other hand, husbands are commanded to love” Wives are commanded to respect their husbands. As a husband desires respect so does the wife desires to be loved.
Marriage is based on trust, if you don’t trust your best friend, you have a weak foundation. Excessive conflicts tend to put a marriage in a bad shape. Actually the enemy tends to use these for his advantage. He knows power is multiplied and not added when couples come together through prayers and reading of the word. He knows that if He can bring excessive conflicts, instead of couples joining forces to fight him, they will be fighting each other. Marriage should be a win win deal, if it’s one sided, that is domination. Unrealistic expectations cripple marriages. It’s not about winning an argument, you could win one but put a relationship in put in jeopardy. It’s about taking time to deposit in each other’s accounts. How can you withdraw what you’ve not deposited? Many breakups takes place because when two people came into a relationship that led into marriage, they came with their accounts full but as time go by, they withdraw from each other’s accounts without depositing. When the accounts became empty, what is there in the relationship to live for?
I believe God created marriage to help His people understand His love towards the church and to help one another live a life pleasing unto the Lord as we deposit in each other with a desire to help them be better in the site of the Lord. Laying down your life would be a heavy price to give up, the payoff is personal growth and the opportunity to develop a wonderful and supportive relationship where there is the art of helping each other put God first, working and building together, forgiveness, honesty, gentleness, humility, submission, responsive, loving, affectionate etc. To love is to lay down your life. Blessings Ev